June 28, 2007

It Is REALLY Hard To Recover From A Morning Like This

This morning started off as most mornings do in our house. I awoke at an ungodly hour to have a quick cup of Joe with Hubby before waving sweetly to him before screeching "See ya Sucker - I'm watching Tivo'd Oprah before I have to wake the kids!"

I quickly jumped into the shower, donned some clothes and make-up and then woke the kids. Yelling to them to get up, get dressed and ready for Summer Camp (yeah me), I asked what they would like for breakfast. Typical morning, really.

I took their orders and headed to the kitchen only to find Old Mother Hubbard had fucking forgot to buy more groceries. I knew we were LOW - but not OUT of EVERYTHING. DH takes breakfast AND lunch from home and had used up the last of the rations. To be fair, with the 4 of us eating EVERY meal here - I should have bought more - but that matters none now. I had NO milk, NO bread, NO pancake mix, NO waffles - NO NOTHING. See what a stellar Mom I am????

I quickly rounded up the kids, hopped in the truck, sopping wet hair and all and rode off to Dunkin Donuts for a plain bagel as is - just put it in the bag thankyouverymuch and one plain bagel lightly toasted with cream cheese. When asked if I wanted anything else - I asked for a Margarita with salt and was met with an uncomfortable silence from the talking box. I guess they didn't get my humor. Not that I would have LAUGHED if they gave me one - I would have LOVED them if that were the case. Shit - 7:30 - need to get home - have kids eat, brush hair and teeth and I still need to blow-dry my hair and get the kids to Summer Camp BEFORE 8:15.

Drive home - pull into the garage look over to front seat where I put the DD bag full of the breakfast bagels and my purdy knock-off Kate Spate purse and OH. MY. FUCKING. GOD. WHAT. THE. FUCK. IS. THAT. IN. MY. FUCKING. PURSE. STICKING. OUT. OF. THE. FUCKING. TOP. OF. THE. PURSE. AAAAAaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

Ugly Ass Also Know As Acanthocephala terminalis

That last part was my screaming like a little girl as I ran screaming from the truck abandoning my kids to fiend for themselves. Stellar Mom, right? Right?!?

They peered into the front seat to see what all my screaming was about and matched my scream with their own and ran for cover in the house. I still had to get breakfast out of the car NEXT TO THIS GIANT BUG IN MY PURSE, OH MY GOD WHAT IS IT DOING IN THERE? AND WHERE DID IT COME FROM? AND HOW THE FUCK LONG HAS IT BEEN IN THERE? AND WHAT IF I TOUCHED IT REACHING FOR MY PHONE WHILE DRIVING? - I would be DEAD right now as I would have absolutely driven off the road! And did it have FRIENDS OR A FAMILY LIVING IN THERE!! All of these things are swirling through my head as I walk back to the truck.

I peer into the passenger side - which is pretty simple to do since BOTH the driver and back door are WIDE OPEN - not closed as we exited in a bit of a haste. PLEASE GOD LET IT NOT BE THERE - PLEASE GOD. Shit, fuck - still there. IN MY PURSE!

I grabbed the bagel bag and threw it into the house. I went back to the truck. I am the Mom (Stellar Mom) after all and I must dispose of this creature myself. I lifted the purse, walked with it as far away from me as my out-stetched arms would allot and flicked it with a piece paper right outside the garage door.

Victory was MINE!

I shut the garage door and ran inside to gather up the kids, what little I had left of my dignity and a new pair of undies.

Making a quick grocery list for a run there after the Summer Camp drop-off, I shoved the kids into the truck, opened the garage door and saw it sitting there mocking me - perhaps even giving me the finger.....

I walked over and letting out a mighty Ninja Wail stomped on his ugly ass.

After groceries, I am driving through Dunkin Donuts AGAIN and demanding that Margarita.

June 27, 2007

Junior Animal Control

Both of my kids are signed up at the town Summer Camp. For a mere $100/kid - they can enjoy 5 different activities - from 8:30 - 12:30 for two whole weeks. Some of the activities include: Kids in the Kitchen, Arts and Crafts, Theatre, Outdoor Activities and for the true geeks at heart Math, Science and Reading for Fun.
As if.

The kids love it as it gets them out of the house for half of the day, they get to see their friends and I don't beat them as much. I kid, as much.

I get a few hours of quiet to work, in exchange for the semi-lame activities.

For Kids in the Kitchen - they have made Rice Crispy Treats, Chocolate Covered Pretzels and Dirt Pudding. Exciting? Hardly. I am only bitter as I have not gotten one freaking scrap of food from this. Sheesh, the nerve.

The new addition to this program is one called Junior Animal Control. Lil Man, being lover of all paws and fur, jumped at the very THOUGHT of an entire 45 minutes devoted to animal speak. Especially since my eyes glaze over at his droning on about the POOR kangaroos in the desert and how they have to lick their paws to stay cool..................sorry I think I dozed off there just repeating it.

Come to find out, Jr. Animal Control is akin to Jr. Police Explorers. They teach young kids the basics of being an ASPCA Officer. Things like, how to know if your dog is scared or mad. When to pet a dog or cat - and more importantly when NOT to.

This particular lecture intrigued Lil Man and he could not WAIT to tell me EVERY.FREAKING.DETAIL.

"So, we watched this video and it told us that when a dog is scared it has it's ears down, it's tail between its legs and we should not pet it and when it's mad it is showing its HUMUNGOUS teeth and growling and barking and YOU SHOULD NOT PET IT!!!!!! AND if you are outside and a straight dog (did he say straight?!?) comes up to you should make like a TREE if you are standing up - LIKE THIS (quickly stiffens into tree formation) and if you are SITTING DOWN and a straight down comes (OMG - he DID say STRAIGHT DOG) up to you and you KNOW it's a bad dog (starting to giggle visualizing the BAD GAY DOGS as opposed to the BAD STRAIGHT DOGS) you should get into a ROCK position (Quickly rolls on the floor covering his ears with his fists) and THEN DO. YOU. KNOW. WHAT. YOU. DO. IF. THE. STRAIGHT. DOG. KEEPS. COMING. UP. TO. YOU????????

"Tell him you have 2 kids?"

Thank you - I'm here all week.............

June 26, 2007

Evening Swim

Swimming in the pool with the kids and DH last night after dinner and karate, around 7:30 - 8ish. We water is warm, but the air is cooler and after an hour or so Miss Thing and I are done and wrap ourselves in towels and watch the boys splash about from the safety of the deck.

DH and Lil Man are horsing around, throwing each other in the water and then jumping off the deck into the pool. Cannonballs (actually we call them Meatballs being that the house IS an Italian household) and so forth. On one of the MANY times both are standing on the edge of the deck, perched, ready to jump in - Miss thing poses a question.....

Miss Thing - "Dad? Do you have hair on your butt?"

This makes DH turn around really quickly, nearly falling into the pool. He reached around to be sure his ass has not made an unexpected appearance and is relieved that it has, in fact, stayed under wraps.

DH obviously shaken asks - "What? Why would you ask that?"

Miss Thing shrugs - "Cuz I can see hair right above it on your back right above your bathing suit - I just wondered if it went down onto your butt, that's all."

I am laughing, my face hiding behind my towel, just watching DH squirm.

Lil Man pipes up - "No Miss Thing - BOYS have hair in their BUTT CRACKS."

DH and I look at each other and I completely lost it.

June 21, 2007

Sharpie, You Old Broad

And NOW a Meme....

When I am an Old Woman I Hope To:

• Be able to sit on my porch of my (summer home) villa in Tuscany, Italy with my gorgeous husband and watch the sunrise.

• Live without financial worries.

• Not be alone.

• Always have my kids, and their families near me and close to me.

• Be free of health issues and die in my sleep as a VERY OLD BROAD.

When I Am An Old Woman I Will Not:

• Wear old lady clothes, have an old lady hair-do and complain about my ailments.

• Be full of regrets.

• Forget what it was like to feel young, be young and live life.

• Forget to LEARN something new every day.

• Forget to love, be loved, and show love.

There ya have it. Now I'm tagging Sherry, Michele, Blue and Heather.


(That is pronounced in true gangsta phonetics, of course.)

I am officially shaking off the Bad Ju-Ju I have been wading in and focusing on the good. I really do believe in the whole idea of Karma and Bad attracts Bad and Good attracts Good, and all that happy horse crap.

I have been incredibly slow for work for the last few weeks - something that almost never happens and considering I work for myself - this is not a good thing.

No work = No money (right before the big departure to Home of the Mouse in 24 days. Sigh.)

Needless to say, this particular thing is not the worst thing that could happen. I have had an incredibly great first half of the year. I made a lot of money.

So, what's the problem?

I don't know HOW to have nothing to do. I am USED to being busy. REALLY BUSY. And this came at a time when it seemed the whole world just STOPPED. The kids finished school. I finished teaching. I finished my class. I finished my work website. I have next to no work. All at the same time.

So, why can't I enjoy a little downtime? I DON'T FUCKING KNOW. My house is spotless. I have done everything from fertilize the entire acre of lawn I have with a push spreader. I have bought topsoil and filled in wholes in said lawn and planted new seed. I have weeded ever inch of my yard. I have cleaned the pool so much it is spotless. I am contemplating staining the 600 square foot deck - WITH A PAINT BRUSH. Someone - send Meds!

You'd think I could just enjoy the kids, right? Do some fun stuff with them, no? Guess what - THEY are ENJOYING their downtime - WITHOUT asking me for anything!

So - today is a new day. I am sending out the Good Vibes in order to get the Good Vibes. This really helped....

Next, a Meme that Chris from Serendipity Mine had tagged me for like a month ago.....

June 19, 2007

Apparently, Someone Wants To Be Sharpie MORE Than Me....

Someone stole my identity.

Yes, they did.

Fucking, fuckers, McFuckHeads.

I got a call from my On-The-Ball Credit Card SECURITY department (ya know, it's NEVER good when the SECURITY department calls you) to ask me if I had authorized a $2700 cash transfer to a Nameless Bank Account.

"Uhhhhhhh NO!"

"We didn't think so. We had to be sure. We had frozen the transaction to be sure."

"How? Who?"

"Seems like it was either by phone or e-mail. Either way - this person may have your social security number, name address and now your credit card number."

What the Gray FUCK IS THAT???

I have them cancel the account, issue new cards, put a password on top of the security question on my account.

Phone rings AGAIN the next day.

"Sharpie - ya know that brand new credit card number we issued yesterday that you haven't even gotten the cards for?"

"Uhhhhh Yeah."

"Seems that this person who has your information is using the internet to hack into your account. We have a HOTMAIL account and an IP address - but have not figured out exactly who it is. But Sharpie, they DO have your social security number - it's the only way to log in."

Shit. That means they can do anything. Open an account, get a loan - ANYTHING.

I have a new account opened and frozen until I call. I deny all internet access to that card. I spin around 3 times and Say There's No Place Like Home, There's No Place Like Home...

Next, I had to call Equifax - to have a Consumer Alert put on my name and social, as well as DH's. Topped with a PAID program that will HAVE to get a PERSONAL OK from MOI via phone for anything from a $200 credit card purchase to a balance transfer to permission to fart in my general direction. It is an immediate response. Nothing goes through without me.

This whole thing sucks the Big One. I am more than a bit paranoid right now. Could it be someone I know? I can't be sure until they do their investigation. And sometimes I wonder if I shouldn't use my real name on here - I guess that answers that.

Everyone - check your credit reports and check often - this can happen to ANYONE!

*Updated to add that all 3 agencies are linked and you only have to contact one in order to put a Consumer Alert on your name. Just an FYI.

June 14, 2007

Primary Colors

Last night we proudly attended Lil Man's Karate Grading Night. This is a night that occurs every few months or so to test the kids and find out if they have learned enough to allow them to move up in rank. This rank is presented in the form of a new colored belt. This prize is coveted by the kids. A sacred night of sorts. And so we sat on pins and needles hoping that Lil Man could prove himself in proper form and technique, sparring combat with another student, and the all important breaking of a board with his closed fist.

He did a phenomenal job! He looked poised and ready. This is a far cry from the days when I had to drag him out of the house kicking and screaming because he hated the uniform and refused to wear a cup. They are required to wear a cup at all times because of the sparring and well, I was not always as diligent as a mom could be and often let him sneak in sans the protective gear. However, that all came to a screeching halt when the teacher asked him point-blank if he had one on. He can not lie. I take full credit for this flaw. I can't lie to save my life. His truthful response landed him on the side-lines remanded to watch as the other kids kicked and punched the shit out of each other. And I ended up with a terse scolding by the male instructor that reminded me if I ever wanted to have grandchildren to carry on the family name - I would make him sport the nut bag protector. So, Lil Man and I ripped apart his old cup and I added some material to get a better fit. His ummm size, requires that my 7-year old wear a teenager cup and it was ill-fitting around the waist. The things we do for our kids, right?

So, where was I? Oh yes - the grading. He stood tall and at attention and when his name was called first, he called out a mighty "Yes Sir!" and walked in front of the Big Cheese. Bowing to show respect, he looked up hopefully. The Big Cheese proceeded to tell him he was very proud of him and for all of his hard work, he was being given the coveted Blue Belt. I believe he may have floated over to the wings where I snapped pictures of his ear-to-ear grin and then promptly got back in line, as is required.

After all the names were called, we headed out the door to get home for some celebratory ice-cream.

He asked anxiously, "Did I do good?"

"Good? You did great! We are SO proud of you! Are you happy?"

Yelling in the sports-announcer voice, "Yeah! Blue BABY!"

We all laughed.

He adds in the same voice, "And ya can't MAKE Blue!"

I got completed hysterical, as did Miss Thing. Tears streaming down my face, I look over at DH who is looking at us like we belonged in the looney bin. I realized he didn't get the joke.

Through my tears, I am gasping "You don't get it, huh? Ya can't MAKE blue - it's a joke! An ART JOKE - Blue is a primary color - you can't MAKE BLUE!!!!!"

DH looks from one of us to the next and shakes his head. "Bunch of artists!"

Yes, yes we are.

June 13, 2007

Ya Know What's Funny?? Arm-Farts.

Yes, I did say arm-farts.

Apparently, Miss Thing, who has made it these past 9 years without the knowledge of knowing how to prefect the art of Arm-Farting, hit her stride last night. She had been in the shower a VERY long time. I assume nothing about this. I ask nothing about this. I just hope that whatever parts of her needed to be washed ARE in fact washed. They always seem to be. On her grand departure from the bathroom, I watch her pass by my open office door. Regally strolling by, towel loosely gathered around her, draping on the ground like a cape, hair soaked and sticking to her face and back, a mischievous grin on her face.

I look at her and think, "My God she is growing up so fast. She is nearly a teenager. She is so beautiful."

I must have had a glazed over look in my eyes, not really focused on her per se, more staring in her direction.

And that's when she let loose her new found talent. A cacophony of arm-farts to bring down the house - followed by the most hysterical laughter you have ever heard. Pttpf, Pttpf, Pttpf, Pttpf, Pttpf!

The kind of laughter you really can't help but join in with. Try as I might - I could not keep a straight face. I started cracking up. And I continued to crack up every time I heard it. Like when she closed her door to get dressed, when she ran down the hall to show her father and his laughter over hers, when I heard her brother proclaiming that he JUST DID NOT KNOW HOW TO DO IT, and her patiently trying to show him. Each and every time - I laughed.

Childish, I know. Hilarious - most definitely.

I warned her not to do it at school - because she raises her shirt half way up to get a good grip. She was so disappointed. I hoped the new day would come and she would have moved onto the next thing. I decided to not mention it again. She is a girlie-girl after all.

I walked by her bathroom this morning - and there she was sleepy faced, yawning, sitting on the thrown clearly just sitting there swinging her feet.

"Good Morning Sweetie." A usual ritual.

"Morning." Quietly. She's tired.

I pass by and continue my way towards the stairs when I hear it.


And then hysterical laughter - hers and mine.

God, I love that kid! In case you have no idea what I'm talking about - you can get instructions here or here.

June 11, 2007

Last Week Of School (Or Reasons Why I Can Feel My Shoulders Lifting - Cuz I Have So Much Less Shit To Do)

Well - here we are - Monday morning - June 11th and all is starting to feel right with the world. Except that there is a bomb scare in neighboring towns and all the schools are in Defcon 4 - EXCEPT us - whatever - I am putting my faith in God that he will bring my babes back home with nary a hair missing from their heads or I WILL BURN THAT MOTHER DOWN!

Anyway - I digress.

I, my friends, am in great spirits - for I have hit THE WEEK THAT HAD ENDINGS. You know the week....the week when things you have dreaded ARE FINALLY FREAKING OVER....you do know what I mean, right? I am not THE ONLY one who looks forward to things that I dread doing to just BE OVER FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.

Here's what I am happy for....

1. My master's class is officially over on Tuesday. HOWEVER, I finished my final paper THIS MORNING!! AND it totally kicks ass. Well, I mean considering the subject matter (David Hume and John Dewey and their contrasting views and critiques of Leonardo da Vinci's Mona Lisa as thought by me) Concept is to talk in depth about their philosophies and then come to a conclusion of what they might have said about the piece. And I TOTALLY rocked it - with visuals and everything. Of course I did. NOT TO MENTION (have I even mentioned??) that I have a 100 average in that class previous to the final paper??!!?? Did I mention a ONE FUCKING HUNDRED? No? Ok - now I did.

2. Miss Thing has a field trip today and I actually remembered to pack her a lunch with all of her favorite things (Is it totally fucked up that she brought a can of juice and I packed a plastic spoon to help open it so she doesn't hurt her fingers??) a Dunkin Donuts plain bagel - plain - nothing on it - no cream cheese - not even cut, Hostess Coffee Cake and a small bottle of water. AND I remembered the money for the gift shop AND the can good they were asking each kid to donate for the Zoo.

3. Karate grading is Wednesday and Thursday and then we are DONE FOR THE SUMMER. Thank God - there will NOT be driving to that smells-like-feet-all-the-fucking-time place 4 days a week for at least a month. If you take off more than that - they up your monthly bill $10 per kid. Can you believe THAT racket!

4. Kids are done with school on Friday. Which means - they are actually done NOW and will be doing next to nothing, followed by nothing for 5 straight days. Excuse me - 3 straight days and 2 half days.

5. I secured gifts for both teachers at the highly impressive - Yankee Candle Semi-Annual Sale - BOGO baby!

6. I bought the bus driver a very nice little flowering plant ($2 at Walmart) and transplanted into a beautiful clay pot ($5) and it is SO CUTE!! I think she'll love it.

7. Father's day gifts for my father, DH's father (his we already delivered yesterday as DH will be in Boston next weekend for work) and DH are all set and ready to go. I do need to wrap - but no big deal!

8. Our 11th Anniversary was last Friday and I stuck to our "no gifts, no cards 'cuz we just bought a treadmill and let's make that our gift to each other" deal. DH came home with a dozen red roses - cuz he was afraid I had bought a card. (I did but didn't give it to him - I wanted him to feel special about doing it ;-)

9. Vacation to Disney is a month away - my God that came quick! I can hardly wait! I think we will be making a quick stop in Orlando to see DH's family who's son just got drafted by the NFL!! How freaking cool is THAT?!

10. My website for work is complete and totally kick ass - thanks to my awesome sister and father. Now to do an email blast to announce it to my clients. Cross your fingers!

Are you all loving this week as much a I am?

June 06, 2007

Back To Hell

Hell's Kitchen that is!

Chef Ramsay is back and bolder than ever! God, I totally love this show.

One complaint - they have loaded the cast with a bunch of cry-baby sissies! In the FIRST episode alone there are no less than 4 fucking crying jags. Two of those came from a man! Are you kidding me? You are crying? On the first fucking show? Do you realize WHAT the prize is? A million dollar salary AT YOUR OWN FUCKING RESTAURANT! Did you think it was going to be easy?


Call me callous - but I am quite tired of all the touchie-feelie man tears I have seen of late. I nearly walked out of SpiderMan 3 after seeing everyone in the fucking cast cry!

I whispered to Lil Man "This is nothing but a cry-baby girl movie - not a Superhero flick. If ONE MORE PERSON cries - I swear I'm gonna scream."

Lil Man - "Mom!"

Me - "I mean it - I am going to walk out!"

I know, I know - men are SUPPOSED to be more in touch with their feeling and crap. WHATEVER. I am OLD SCHOOL and need my SuperHero movies to NOT REQUIRE TISSUES!

So Rock On Chef Ramsay - Give Em Hell, Yes?

June 05, 2007

We Are All A Buzzzzzzzzzzzzzz Around Here

We just got word that Miss Thing has received the dubious honor of representing her class in the all-important 3rd Grade Math Fact Bee! Also known as the "Event For The Kids Who Can't Spell - So We Made Up a Math Fact Bee". Doesn't even sound right - Math. Fact. Bee. - Spelling Bee sounds right, no? And why a Bee? Can someone tell me what the fuck that has to do with a bunch of overly-sensitive preteens sweating profusely TRYING to say as quickly as humanly possible "8 X 8 is 64!!!!!!!!" The whole event does not last long. The kids have to answer as many multiplication facts as possible in one minute. I know. You are riveted.

In case of a tie - they bring out the BIG guns - division. And the winner gets to do my taxes. I kid. I have no idea WHAT the winner gets. Probably NOTHING as the entire school is under the "We Are ALL Number One - No One Is Better Than Anyone Else" philosophy. I can't stand it. And Miss Thing - SO COMPETITIVE!

I am very proud of her especially since just mere weeks ago she was struggling to even get them right. Apparently schools do not teach Multiplication Facts the same way we learned - by repetition until memorized. Their new ways including teaching kids how to do the 9 Tables with your fingers. Have you ever? It seems it's all the rage. All the cool kids are doing it.

Her teacher e-mailed me to tell me she was chosen earlier in the day and by the time Miss Thing burst through the door - I was busy doing 10 things and totally let the wind out of her sails. She later confided that she "thought I might have been happier." OUCH. Hard to recover from that sting. I felt bad. Really FUCKING bad. I should have made a bigger deal. I should have baked cookies or put up a poster. Good to see I am still in the running for Mother of the Year 2007....

The truth IS I AM happy. Thrilled - over the moon and scared that she'll be disappointed if she doesn't do well. I need to LEARN how to be more emotional with my kids and let them SEE me feel instead of trying to always cover it up with a brave face - which just looks like a face of indifference.

So - tomorrow around 2:30 - say a little prayer for Miss Thing! I'll be there cheering her on - with pom-poms and a happy ear-to-ear grin if I have to crazy glue it on! Go Miss THING!!!!!!!!!!!

June 01, 2007

T-Minus 2 Weeks and Counting

My kids are officially out of school as of June 15th. They actually have fewer than that if you consider the half days, field trips, field/picnic day and the fact that they are not even paying attention anymore because it is so close to THE END. I remember this time of year, for me, was always a mix of euphoria and sadness. Euphoria at the fact that the summer was coming and it would be long and great and NO SCHOOL. The sadness was from leaving my friends, knowing the summer was going to be long and NO SCHOOL in which to see them.

My mother did not DO playdates. We did not DO sleepovers. The only way you were going to see a friend - was by accident. We didn't even go to but a few random Birthday Parties in the summer. It just was NOT done. You played with the kids in your neighborhood - whether you liked them, ever would hang out with them, or not. Sounds sad, right?

We didn't have a pool. We didn't even have a Slip'n Slide. And GOD FORBID you turned on the hose - my father would have been out there screaming to "TURN THE GOD DAMN WATER OFF!" He even went so far as to tell me and my sister that there were spiders in the hose to get us not to drink out of the hose. Imagine my embarrassment, newly-married to DH and outside on a real scorcher, when he bends down to take a long slurp from the hose and I yell, "OH MY GOD - Don't drink from there - there are SPIDERS in there!!!!!" Oh hell yes, he LAUGHED! I remember him saying something along the lines of, "You're a smart girl - how in the world do you think the spiders were going to live in there with the rushing water pushing them out?" Whatever. It sounded completely plausible when I was a kid.

Both of my parents worked - so we didn't get to go to Mall, the movies or any other fun thing in the summer. We did however, get to play a few houses down at a woman's house who did in-house babysitting, which was great as there were ALWAYS kids to play with.

Summer is not the same for kids anymore. Summer is filled with Summer Camps, pools, playdates and sports. My two aren't even outside for 1 hour before they are begging to "go somewhere" or "do something" as if it is my sole purpose in life to grant their every wish. What am I a freaking Jeanie? (I could NEVER pull off the outfit) I am taking every Friday off for the summer - so we can plan to go places at least once a week. That's the glory of owning your own business. We are going to Disney - again - this year. Please God no repeat sicknesses for Lil Man. Remember the puking and shitting of the bed????? We have a big beautiful pool to lounge in every day after I finish my work day which should be 2 or 3 o'clock. Will they be happy with that? Not freaking likely!

So I find myself with the same feeling about summer that I had as a kid - euphoria and sadness. I will be euphoric to NOT have the ridiculous crazy schedule and hustle and bustle of the school year. (Although they WILL have Mandatory Summer Reading AND Math Sheets - I can't even IMAGINE if I had homework that they COLLECT on the first day of school, over the summer!) I know I will be happy to spend time with them - laugh with them. But there will be a sadness that I am losing my nice quiet, peaceful home that I coveted all year alone in my office with no interruptions.

Am I the only one thinking it is going to be a LONG summer? What kinds of cool things do you do with your kids to keep away the boredom?