May 29, 2008

Favorite Things

Not as good as Oprah (read you ain't getting any free shit from me), but I figured I would share some of my favorite things with you all.

1. Losing 40 pounds. Yes, as of Sunday, May 25th, I am officially 40 pounds lighter. I cannot even articulate how fucking awesome that feels to say.

2. Speaking of Oprah, did anyone see her Summer Favorite Things episode? Did you see the recipe for The Best Turkey Burger EVER?? Well, it is AMAZING!! I made them over the weekend and OH. MY. GOD. they fucking rule. Though, I did walk around the grocery store a few times looking for Major Grey's Chutney (tip: look for the Japanese/Indian food section)

3. John Freida's Frizz-Ease 100% SHINE Glossing Mist. If you ever wanted shiny, beautiful hair in 10 seconds, buy this stuff at your local grocery or pharmacy.

4. Banana Boat UltraMist Aloe After Sun Spray. If you or your family sports the moon glow, as I do, you'll love this quick spritz of heaven on those overexposed shoulders.

5. Envirosax Reusable Grocery Bags from I bought these awhile back and they are amazing. Large and strong, you need less than half the plastic bags you usually use. AND if you bring them to your grocery store, MANY will give a 5¢ discount PER BAG you bring. PLUS, you look totally chic doing it. They'll end up paying for themselves and you can feel good about your part to save the environment. I leave them in the car and bring them with me wherever I go, including the mall.

I think I am going to treat myself today to a mani/pedi for reaching a big weight loss goal. Happy Thursday to you all!

May 22, 2008

How The F*ck Is It Thursday Already??


Someone ripped me off a few days this week apparently, because I am SO far behind on my Grad School classes that even as I write that, my heart skipped a few beats. I guess it doesn't help that I barely am paying attention in these classes - because HELLO, I already run my own company, so having an entire class dedicated to it is like rewriting the history of the past 9 years. And the other class is about working with non-profits and I've done that a million times. So, I am disconnected and uninterested. Thankfully, I have a friend in that class who emailed me TWICE last week to ask if I was "OK" because I had neglected to post TWO assignments. Yep. I am really on the ball.

At least I handed in my grades for the Art College class I taught. Nothing spectacular this semester, which was really disappointing. No Shining Star. No Dark Horse. No Incredible Pain In The Ass.

I guess it also doesn't help that this time of year, I am torn in so many different directions with the kids and such. They are winding down and all of the Art Shows, Musical Choir Presentation, Field Day, Field Trip and all of that are peppering me daily. I can't wait for the snail pace of summer. Of course by then, I will want to drown myself in the pool because of the fighting, bickering, moaning and groaning.

I also am completely engrossed in the planning of our summer trip to Europe (30 days and counting) and have so very much to do. All of us need new summer clothes (some of us JUST bought new summer clothes LAST year and they are ALL WAY TOO BIG), but I am holding off and hoping to fit nicely in the next size down. The kids need everything from undies to PJs, so, I need to work a bunch of hours to cover all of that. We're only bringing enough clothes for a week and washing at my SIL's house, because HELLO it's HER HOUSE. I am SO looking forward to actual sleeping, walking around and sitting on a toilet while away on vacation - I have NEVER done that before. It's the little things, no?

I'm off to go finish that huge school project due on Friday. Then I have a deadline at work that requires about 35 hours of work done today, it ought to be interesting. Thank God for the long weekend. Have a great Memorial Day!

May 19, 2008

Weigh In - Week 18 & 19

Because I had already posted two posts last week, I didn't want to send my readers into cardiac arrest (God forbid) by seeing I actually put a bit of effort into this blog. So, I'm a bit behind.

Here's the official weigh-in Weight Loss for Week 18....

1 pound

Here's the official weigh-in Weight Loss for Week 19....

2 pounds

Official weight loss Grand Total is 39 lbs in 19 weeks.

Now 21 more to go.

Here's a few things that I encountered this week...

• Since I refuse to buy new clothes yet, I have taken to darting the back of my jeans to keep them up.

• I tried on 2 pairs of Size 12 Jeans and they fit (a bit too snugly in the butt) or perhaps I am so used to the above, I wasn't comfy.

• 39 pounds allows you to wear that new Buxton Purse your kids bought you, without looking like someone tied you in string like a pork roast.

• Seeing a "1" in front of my weight is a WHOLE SHITLOAD better than seeing a "2".

• Even more amazing, the "1" is followed by a number I haven't seen since before I had my kids 10 years ago.

This week, I hope to hit 40 pounds and then I will have to stand outside my house with a sandwich board because HOLY FUCK, I've lost 40 pounds. I would pinch myself, but I bruise easily.

May 15, 2008

Sometimes, You Get What You Deserve

I know many of you were outraged when Top Bitch Of The Earth Lori Drew admitted to the malicious online torture of a 13 year old girl, Megan Meier in a phony MySpace account. Drew posed as a 16-year old boy Josh, who at first befriended the girl and then turned on her by telling her "the world would be better off without her". Meier later committed suicide by hanging herself.

Today, it was announced that Lori Drew was indicted on charges of conspiracy and accessing protected computers to obtain information to inflict emotional distress. Drew faces up to 20 years in prison.

Let me be the first to say GOOD. I hope you get all 20 and find it so fucking miserable, you hang yourself in jail. Because Lori Drew, THE WORLD WOULD BE BETTER OFF WITHOUT YOU.

May 12, 2008

A Letter To My Daughter's Fourth Grade Teacher,

First off, let me say how much I adore you personally and professionally. From the first parent teacher conference, I knew that you would be a tremendous positive influence in my daughter's life. Your personality and wit are matched with my own and I knew my daughter would thrive. But. BUT. I had no idea how much I would love you on Mother's Day.

Sure, I thought the flower photo memo holder you helped them create was fantastic. And yes, I thought the picture frames with the kids pictures in them were only merely shadowed by the awesome notes that wrote on back. And while the personal poems from each student were the icing on the cake, it was not my favorite part of Mother's Day.

My daughter retold a story about your personal quest to teach each student the proper use of Possessive Pronouns, both plural and singular usages. I admire your tenacity. I admire your never-ending quest to teach children the proper use of the English language. And when she told of how you wrote the following sentence on the Smart Board...

Where are the dogs balls?

And the entire fourth grade class broke out in hysterical laughter. I admire you most for keeping a straight face through the entire ordeal and steadfast until someone answered how to correctly use the apostrophes. My daughter said you never wavered. I myself would not have had that in me.

So, above all else, I thank you for the hardest and longest laugh I have ever had on Mother's Day.

Miss Thing's Mom

May 07, 2008

I Am Really Going To Have To Try Harder

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May 05, 2008

Weigh In - Week 17

Here's the official weigh-in Weight Loss for Week 17....

2 pounds

Official weight loss total is 36 lbs in 17 weeks.

Now 24 more to go.

And on a total side note - When I lose ONE more pound, I will be officially out of the obese category according to the BMI charts. NOT that I necessarily go by those - because really I don't feel I was ever obese, overweight for sure, obese, not so much. Nevertheless, I'll be out and closer to my goal weight.

May 02, 2008


I was going to tell you all a really funny story that happened last night until I spoke with a neighbor this morning. Miss Thing has been BFFs with their daughter for the last few years and recently grew apart due to having other friends and interests, yet they remain good friends. The mother and I have had our differences, but have always remained very friendly.

Before Miss Thing bounded onto the bus, I commented on the fact that the bus was not stopping at friend's house and hadn't for the last few days. Miss Thing yells over her shoulder that she was told by another friend, that her friend had gone to the ER, had something removed and were having tests done. The hairs on the back of my neck raised. I went inside to call the mother.

Instead, I got the father, a very nice quiet guy. I explained that I was not being nosey, just checking on everyone as Miss Thing had said her friend had gone to the ER. He was quiet, then replied, "Not really."

Heart is pounding, I ask quietly, "What? Why?"

"She has cancer." And then he broke down crying.

They are awaiting further testing to be done on Monday. I am so devastated for this family. PLEASE, PLEASE put them in your prayers that everything will be alright. And hug your kids.

May 01, 2008

So Proud I Could Burst

This past weekend marked the start of the 2008 Soccer Season here in town. Both kids are registered to the Rec. League and being that this is their third year playing, we knew what was in store - We would have NO life on the weekends. Lil Man's games are on Saturday and Miss Thing's are on Sunday. Couple that with Thursday and Friday night practices and Monday rolls around quicker than Angelina adopts another kid.

Lil Man has become a lot more aggressive and actually went after the ball quite a bit in his game. He even played goalie for awhile as it is his favorite position because it requires NO running. He is my child, after all.

Sunday morning came and I mentioned to DH that I felt THIS year was Miss Thing's Year. She had worked tirelessly for the last two years to try to score a goal. Last season she managed to do just that. Twice. She was ecstatic. And we were really proud, she had worked so hard.

But. THIS year, I had this feeling in my chest before the game. THIS year, I just knew....would be something special for her. It seemed like overnight my little girl had sprouted into a tween and with that had total control over her lean, mean body. She was more confident and competitive and athletic. No matter how I tried, that funny feeling in my chest stayed.

Game time came and we sat freezing in the fold up chairs cheering on the Pink Shirted Team. They had put Miss Thing in the forward position, perfect for scoring. She looked over at me and nodded her head, like "Are you ready for this?" I laughed to myself. God, she IS my kid. Next thing I knew my Little Lightning had racked up three goals and had shot for at least another three which the goalie managed to stop. THREE GOALS. IN ONE GAME. Collectively more than she had managed an entire season before. That feeling in my chest was so right. I could nearly contain myself and cheered her on through the whole game. But, cool as a cucumber she kept herself composed. When did she get so grown up?

As a parent, absolutely nothing makes you happier than knowing your kid met the challenges they had set for themselves. She walked off the field head held high and smile ear to ear. I thought the day was about as perfect for her as any I had ever dreamed for her.

She is so proud and so are we.

Tuesday, I picked her up from Newspaper Club, she and a group of other 4th graders write articles and such for the school paper. She works really hard on the ones she creates. Perhaps she'll be a writer like her Auntie. And she walked out with another smile ear to ear. She had been chosen as Student of the Month.

Three goals and Student of the Month all in one week. I'm not sure we're ever gonna top this.

Way to go Miss Thing! You Rock!