April 30, 2007

Mr. Smooth (Or Is It Schmooze?)

Saturday was Lil Man's birthday and turning the Big 7 was absolutely all he could talk about. There was the Laser Tag birthday party for friends ON. HIS. ACTUAL. BIRTHDAY!!!! (he was SO pumped about that particular fact) immediately followed by the family party. There were 2 cakes, goodie boxes filled with Animal Stuff, presents galore and more sweat and blooming testosterone than I have ever seen in my life.

Ensuring that this is THE BEST WEEK EVER!! a field trip the Friday before his party to his favorite Science Museum for school. I did not sign up to chaperone - because I have already done my time THANK.YOU.VERY.MUCH. and would rather scoop my own eyeballs out with a melon baller than ride the bus again.

Friday night, feverishly decorating cakes, phone rings...

Me - "Hello?"

Lil Man's Friend Alex's Mom - "Hi Sharpie - yes Hi - I, um, remember when I told you that I really sucked at calling to RSVP and then I did it right away - and well, now I can't find the invitation and I have no idea when the party is tomorrow."

Me - "Oh good - I thought you were calling to cancel - it's at 11:00."
I like this Mom - she sucks at the Mom thing too - so we can TOTALLY hang.

- "Well, to be honest - I had threatened my little monster that he was not going to be able to come - he's been SO BAD. And I had actually told him he couldn't go and then..... well, and then I went into school for the field trip."

My heart is racing - Oh God - is she going to tell me my Lil Man has NO friends and she felt so bad that she was now going to let him come.... He is different, after all.

Me - "Oh? Why?"

Her - "Well...I walked in and Lil Man came right up to me - looked me up and down and said "You look really Beautiful today!" And so I was so well - I felt so special - he was so sweet I decided right then Alex had to go. "

Me chuckling - "Yes Lil Man is always saying really sweet things. He just does that - out of the blue."

Her - "Yes I felt REALLY special....that was, until the other mom showed up and he walked right up to her and said the exact same thing to her."

Me laughing uncontrollably - "WHAT?! He did it to BOTH of you - what was he doing schmoozing the moms on the field trip - ensuring he wasn't being left behind???"

She is laughing too - "I guess so. He sure is going to go far in life with that quality already so developed."

I got off the phone laughing and found Lil Man lying on the floor watching TV with DH.

Me - "Did you schmooze the moms on the field trip today?"

I quickly catch DH up on the conversation with Alex's Mom.

Lil Man
- "What?? They DID look beautiful!"

I eyeball him with the Mom-Knows-All-Look...

Lil Man - big sigh... "Ok - ONE looked really nice, but I didn't want to make the other one feel bad, so I said it to her too."

That's my Lil Man, learning the ways to a woman's heart. He doesn't even need to be the cutest or the smartest or the funniest - he'll STILL have all the ladies.

UPDATED TO ADD: At the party the same Mom comes and tells me that while she's in the shower getting ready for the party, her son comes in to yell to her to PLEASE TRY to look EXTRA fancy for the party. She explains that it is a Laser Tag party and that they have outside chores to do today and why in God's name does she have to look EXTRA FANCY? His reply....

"It's Lil Man's party and I would like you to look nice. He thinks you're pretty - so you should look extra fancy."

There you have it folks - my Lil Player working his magic at 7 years old.... Oh God, what am I in for????


At 1:54 PM, Blogger Michele said...

This is a GREAT story! I love 'Lil Man stories anyway but this may be the prize.

But shit, I thought I had until at least 6th or 7th garde before my kids cared what I wore. The pressure!!

At 4:34 PM, Blogger Heather said...

Extra fancy...LOL!! Your little guy is too cute. He will be fightin' off the ladies!!

At 8:34 AM, Blogger LadyBugCrossing said...

Ahhh... so many women --- so little time!!

At 12:37 PM, Blogger Wendy said...

I bet he's training to be a politician.

At 10:15 PM, Blogger melodyann said...

All I can say is, you're raising him right, Sharpie.....

At 8:56 PM, Blogger Penny Karma said...

I think I'll have to embrace the whole concept of Extra Fancy.

At 2:09 PM, Blogger HomeFireBlue said...

Well he is YOUR son, Sharps. He knows extra fancy.

At 2:33 PM, Anonymous JayMonster said...

We are now a month away from my daughter's 7th, birthday, and I don't want to tell you what we are going through as she is prepping and planning already.

"I can't possibly wear any of these nail polishes... everybody has seen me in these colors already!"


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