I Wish I Could Tell This Story Via Video

Because I am really not sure I can do it justice via my simplistic and unprofessional wordsmithing, but I am going to give it my all. The reason?? It is the funniest shit I have seen in like a week and a half, perhaps longer. It made me belly laugh. Loudly.

Here's the scene: Lil Man's Holiday (can't say Christmas at our school) party in which a few overly involved Moms have gone rogue and planned it from soup to nuts without the teacher's involvement, which quite frankly she looked happy to have a breather. I imagine this time of year is very tough to keep them focused and even more so when we have had so many days off and delays due to snow.

Rogue Moms had organized games to play like - BINGO - with prizes. Cue the music of SOMEONE in the class not being happy that they lost, right???? I mean, after all, they are 7 and 8 years old. BINGO was played for exactly 3 times and 3 prizes were dispersed to a class of 21. There were some hurt feelings in there, but certainly I think they are old enough to learn to deal with disappointment. Moving on to WAY too many snacks on each plate given to the kids.

In comes the teacher who had a wonderful idea of asking each child to bring in a $1.00 Grab Bag Gift. The kids were to have wrapped the gift and were to pick numbers to receive them. A grand idea really. We found a 3-pack of Dot-To-Dot Game pads (remember those? You capture the square and put your initial in there??) Fun.

The teacher had the kids pick numbers from a baggie and the gifts were numbered as well. No issues in trying to get your friend's gift. Perfect. A few of the Moms and I are standing to the far end of the room watching as the kids are thrilled (or not so thrilled, as the pudgy kid got a jumprope) to open their packages containing crayons, markers, pencils and the like.

Rogue Mom #1's daughter comes over to our group with a look on her face that could only be pulled off by an 8-year old year. It was a combination of complete bewilderment, pissed-offness and injustice.

Rogue Daughter to Mom: "Mom. What. IS. This?"

In her outstretched hand is a book. A thin, paperback book. I look closer and it reads New Testament. After my initial shock, I start to giggle. I can't wait to hear how Rogue Mom is going to handle this. (Let me state for the record a few things. The kids are in a public school - not Catholic school. We, as a family, go to church EVERY week. And I would NEVER give an 8-year old kid a GRAB BAG Bible, because let's face it... that is a weird, inappropriate freaking gift that the kid most certainly did NOT want.)

Rogue Mom glances down at the book and the look that washes over her face is priceless as it matches her daughter's perfectly. Except she is a Room Mom, Girl Scout Leader and all around much nicer (PC) person than I and she quickly resets her face to a huge Joker-style smile and says, "Oh Honnnnnnnneeeeeyyy, how niiiiiiiiiccccce. That's a ... ummmm.... a... The New Testament."

Now, I am still laughing and begin to laugh HARDER when the daughter's look now mixes with puzzlement. She has no idea what a New Testament is.

Rogue Mom goes on, "It's A New Testament. A bible. Like at church."

Now. Now, the look on the kid's face is one that includes the body language of a preteen, hunched over, arms out, complete despair. Can you picture it with me?? She still has that LOOK and Oh My God, it's sending me into hysterical fits of laughter. Cuz really? I totally understand the look.

Rogue Mom quickly looks around and mumbles something to the kid (and I think me) about not knowing who gave the gift and if the Mom was there. I think that was her attempt to get me to stop laughing. Fat Chance Lady.

Trying to distract the daughter, she looks in her other hand and sees a bookmark. So sappy sweet she says, "Oh LOOOOOOOOOOOK, did that nice bookmark come with it?"

And Rogue daughter belts out with all of the disgust she could muster, arms flailing in the injustice of it all and replies and I quote, "Yeah. TO GO WITH THE BIBLE!"

At that point, I am laughing so hard, that I have to turn away, but not before telling the Mom that I totally understood and loved her daughter.

Ahhhh Christmas. Doesn't it make such wonderful memories?

All I Want For Christmas Is Some Time With My Family

It is hard to believe that Christmas morning is a mere 3 days from today. Not that I'm not ready for it, because I am. Christmas cards were mailed, presents were bought and wrapped, and decorations were hung. I even made ornaments for the family from pictures I took of the kids. Mother nature ensured us a White Christmas by dumping nearly a foot of snow over our house this weekend. I can't wait for Christmas morning. I love the looks on the kids' faces. I love their excitement, their energy, their love.

Now that all the stresses of life are at a merciful standstill, I can concentrate on them. Just them. Have fun with them. Hear their laughter and laugh along with them.

I can also reflect on the coming year and all that I am thankful for. Grad school has wrapped up for the semester with another 2 A's. Teaching is over, save for the grades I will turn in today. I will close up the design shop for a week, at least. I can feel my shoulders ease with each word I type.

May you all find this peace and love in your hearts this Holiday Season!




(Aren't they adorable?)

I am off to bake brownies for Lil Man's Christmas Party this afternoon. I'll catch up with you all after the Holidays. Be Safe.

SHA-ZAMMMMMMMMM

What do ya think??

Too Precious Not to Share

As I have told you on many occasions, Lil Man is my loving, sensitive, sweet child while his sister can be nice, her dark sided humor takes over and, well... she is MY child.

But lately, she has been a very affectionate child. Hugging ALL THE TIME. Being very snuggly. Telling us how much she loves us. Don't get me wrong, it is VERY nice and something I had always wanted from her. Even as a baby, she was super independent and had a closer bond with her Daddy. I longed for those moments. Now, 10 years later, I got over it. So, when all the hugging starts I begin to think in what way is she trying to manipulate me. However, I haven't found a single time when this is true.

I guess I have a hard time with it because my parents NEVER were (or are) affectionate in that way. Therefore, I am NOT a hugger, kisser or personal space invader at ALL. I have often been called a touch freak. I don't like when people touch me. Really. I tolerate it from certain people, but flatly refuse with others. A psychologist would tell you this is result of the trauma and abuse I withstood in my young years by the Molesting Uncle Who Blew His Brains Out After He Was Found Out. Maybe. More than likely I would have been like this anyway.

Yesterday morning, I was standing by the kitchen sink and suddenly feel two little arms wrap themselves around my waist. Turning around she quickly repositions herself and buries her head into my chest and squeezes tighter. Instead of being cautious, I bend a bit and hug her tight. It occurs to me that she has never been able to wrap her little arms around my waist and have the overlap she does.

Teasingly, I say to her, "WOW! You have never been able to hug Mommy like that before and get your arms all the way around like that. Now you can and almost touch your elbows!"

She giggles into my chest. "I KNOW! I used to have to hug you like this (loosens her grip and makes her arms slightly wider)."

I smile because she is being kind and I don't think she could wrap her little self around any part of me save for my head and neck.

Still teasing her, "So, which do you prefer Skinny Mommy or Fat Mommy?"

Quickly she responds, "Skinny Mommy....wait...no... HAPPY Mommy."

And then my heart burst right there. Perhaps she is sweetening as she gets older. Or perhaps she feels I am more approachable (and hugable) now that I am happier. Either way, I plan to give and accept hugs from her every chance I get.

Forgive Me Bloggers, For I Have Sinned, It's Been 5 Weeks Since My Last Post

Sorry to drop off the face of the earth like that, not that I think I have many readers left after my sister up and abandoned her old site. If you are not aware, she does have a new site, here, that she posts periodically to. Drop by and say hello.

Can you believe how close to Christmas we are? Officially 15 days from today all that planning, prepping and hard work will be reduced to a pile of paper on the floor. Miss Thing hounded DH and I to know the "truth" about Santa and considering she will be 11 in less than a few months and in the 5th grade and able to menstruate, we told her. While she already knew the "truth", I could tell she had really been hoping above hope that all of the information she was receiving from her friends was dead wrong. It never occurred to her before now because (and I quote) "She did not believe there was any way in the world WE would buy her and her brother ALL THAT STUFF!" Some years, me neither. But all in all, in works out well because now she can go on covert shopping excursions and pick out a few gifts for Lil Man. That part helps to seal the silence and makes her feel like one of the grown-ups.

A diet update: At week 47, I have lost another pound, totaling the weight loss at 54 pounds.

It is getting harder to shed any additional weight and those last few pounds are really taking a lot of effort to get rid of. I have decided to post the truth in terms of actual numbers here for a New Year's cleansing and most likely a picture or two. I think I may also tell my hubby what that magical number is that he has been curiously seeking out. Feels like the right time to cleanse myself and start anew. I am also cutting my hair short. I know my sister just fell over right now - quick call 911! I have had long hair for many years and I am just done with it. I have an appointment next week to get my long locks cut into a longer angled bob. I may go shorter come the warmer months, but I don't want my entire neck exposed in the dead of winter. I'll post pics when its done!

I am off to go pick up my Christmas Cards and get those addressed and in the mail today. Then I have to take out all the presents (crap) I have piled up in the closet and get a realistic list of what I have actually bought so far. Then I can make a smaller (hopefully) list to finish it off this weekend. The wrapping....uuugggghhhh. Can I go on record and say I officially HATE wrapping? I bag as much as possible, but Santa WRAPS, damn him to hell.

Enjoy the chaos of the next few weeks, Tis The Season!