August 23, 2006

Burn Safety Tip #53

When deciding to cook chicken legs on the grill - and prior to grilling, you decide to throw them into a pot of boiling water to help the cooking process - it is NOT ADVISED to try to wedge apart said chicken legs with a giant plastic spoon while TALKING ON THE PHONE particularly if you are pulling the spoon TOWARDS you.

Because when the legs DO break apart, and the water sloshes over the top of the pan and douses your entire right side from you rib cage to you knee - it WILL blister and bleed THROUGH YOUR CLOTHES.

Burn Safety Tip #54

The kids will be scared as you run through the house, half naked with the huge bursting blisters exposed.

Burn Safety Tip #55

Standing next the grill after burning yourself with scalding hot water makes you pee a little in your pants. I'm just sayin.

10 Comments:

At 3:55 PM, Blogger Heather said...

Holy shit, girl, are you okay??! Get yee to some neosporin and tequila, STAT!

And, EWWW! Bloody blisters.

 
At 4:11 PM, Blogger Michele said...

Yuck and ouch and shit!

 
At 9:20 PM, Blogger Penny Karma said...

Duly noted.

 
At 9:48 AM, Blogger Sheri said...

omg - that must've hurt like hell.

Healing vibes to you

 
At 12:00 PM, Blogger Johannah said...

Crap, that really sucks. Burns hurt! I second the tequila.

Go lie down awhile.

 
At 12:19 PM, Blogger Violet said...

Oh my gosh! Are you ok? And seriously, you were still able to grill the chicken after all that?

 
At 7:38 PM, Anonymous lala said...

dumbass

 
At 9:12 PM, Blogger Wayfarer said...

I still have hard callouses on my left hand from when I grabbed the thermometer to pull it out from chicken I was cooking on the grill. Grabbed it full on--WITH MY BARE HAND--then wondered why I was feeling this intense sensation in my fingers. I swore for a good 15 minutes straight!

Why did I do this? I was talking on the phone. You have my sympathies. I'll bet it hurt a whole lot.

 
At 10:48 PM, Anonymous sherry said...

Crazy bitch. STOP COOKING NAKED!!!

 
At 3:17 AM, Blogger Louise said...

Is it inapropriate that I laughed at that? Sorry, hope you're feeling better.

Tequila sounds like a good option right now- with a chaser of vodka.

I once did a similar thing walking from the stove to the sink to drain a pot of pasta- didnt lift the pot high enough and clunked it on the edge of the sink- burning my breasts and stomach with boiling water. It was more mortifying that I screamed and ripped off my tank top splashing cold water on me from the sink, and then realised that a bunch of builders on my neighbours roof were looking straight through the open window at me naked.

They did come round to the house to check on me though. Or check me out. Still not sure.

 

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