Wow, I Guess I Took Some Time Off, Huh?

I had all but abandoned this little 'o blog. Thank you to the few of you who still pop by on occasion to inquire if I have come back to my senses and STOPPED WITH THE PITY PARTY ALREADY?!?!

Well, yes I have thankyouverymuch!

I was in a funk. A deep, dark funk. Not for any particular rhyme or reason.

But, now..... Now, I am much better.

What changed? No idea. I stopped letting shit bother me. I picked up my big girl panties and moved the fuck on. I got over myself by telling myself that I COULD sit here and wallow and let life pass me by OR I could change it and start enjoying life. Simple as that. Make a choice or don't. Completely up to me.

So, I started working out harder. I love to workout. It makes me feel GOOD. ALIVE. I found a ZUMBA school near me and I go 4 times a week. Oh, OBSESSIVE BEHAVIOR I HEAR YOU CALLING!! Whatever, it's better than the food. Can I tell you how much I fucking LOVE ZUMBA?? I love the music, the intensity, and the movements. I love the dripping full body sweat after that hour. I love how spent and alive I feel AT THE SAME TIME. And ya know what? I'm good at it. Who knew? If only I had spent less time in the smoking area in HS and more in modern dance!

I can shake my ass better than I ever thought this white girl ever could. And my body reaps all the benefits. I look better than I have in 15 years. I am leaner. I am more cut. I am STRONG. And I love ever minute, ever step and ever time I push myself that much farther than I thought I could. I am smiling just thinking about it.

Design work is busy, thank god. I am now teaching online at another Art College, as well as on campus at the 1st Art College. Kids are great. DH is great. All is right with the world.

Life is Sweet, Crazy, Chaotic and Back To Normal.

I hope you all are well. I am going to try to come back here and post a bit more often.

How are you all doing??

And So...

It's December 10th. Just mere weeks away from Christmas. And the truth of the matter is... I have no desire to have the holidays come. A more accurate explanation is that I would simply like to check out. Check out of all the holiday mess. Check out entirely for awhile and just be left alone.

Depressed much? Yep. I am.

Not that there is any particular reason, except for maybe, everything in general.

The simple truth is that I am not happy. I am trying to figure out who I am after all these years and... I just don't know who that is anymore. I have tried to be happy being everything to everyone and at the end of the day... I just feel spent.

So... now what?

My Life Is Defined In Weeks

Since the beginning of the summer, I have lived in increments of weeks. I had begun the last chapter of my graduate school classes. I had 11 weeks until i was all over. Considering that I had spent the last three TEARS of my life trying to juggle my full-time job of running the design business, my part-time teaching at the Art College, running the kids from one activity to the next, keeping the household together, meals AND GRADUATE SCHOOL - I felt that 11 weeks was totally doable.

Never had I wished away a summer as I have this one. I know that is sad and you are never supposed to wish away any part of your life, but I did. September could not come soon enough. Yes, we did vacation in VA. Yes, the kids did summer camp and splashed in the pool. Yes, we ate way too many hotdogs off the grill. But. In the back of my head was a constant ticking off of the days until another week was over.

This week I begin Week 7 of 11. I have much to do to be finished, but I am feeling that there isn't a thing that can stop me now. In two weeks I will present my visual portion of the thesis and prepare my defense of my thesis. I have another 2 weeks to design, print and bind my 100 page written thesis in triplicate and send it to the school.

Next week the kids go back to school. I am glad. They need to get back and I need to concentrate. I have done all the clothes shopping. We have all the school supplies and backpacks organized. All the summer reading and math is done. I even tore their rooms apart and organized them this weekend.

September will be a fresh start for us all. Wishing you all a clean, fresh start to a new year!

Just Doin' A Dummy Check....

Have you ever been clothes shopping for HOURS and had tried on SO MANY things that you didn't like, that you almost forgot to put back on YOUR OWN pants and walked out of the dressing room?

Just me??

You Know You Have A Middle Schooler When....

She comes home from school and asks you (in the same manner and tone she would ask to have a snack) what a DICK is!

On the one hand I should have been happy that she had no idea what is was. AND I should be happy that she felt comfortable enough to ask me. BUT. My entire body had an involuntary reaction akin to the way a cat begins the vomit process. And then I composed myself (thank god I was cooking) and told her what it was. And then told her never to say that in front of her father unless she would like to give him a coronary.

For the millionth time, why can't they stay three?

Where Has The Time Gone?

Oh my poor blog, how I have neglected you! So much has been going on and life has gotten in the way. But now that my entire family has found me on Facebook, I will retreat back here to vent and share in quiet anonymity.

To catch you all up to what this school year has brought us...

1. The concert (Motley Crue, Hinder and Theory of a Deadman) was AWESOME. I had not really heard the latter 2 but was so impressed, I am now a fan.

2. The kids have gone Metal and not in the head banging, eardrum splitting way - we've gone orthodontic! Miss Thing has a nice (and colorful) set of braces and Lil Man was a palatal expander (for now) with a promise of a retainer and braces to come! Yippie! My pockets ache already.

3. Both kids have also gotten glasses, so that the school yard taunt can include "Four-Eyes" to go with Metal Mouth. Talk about the awkward years.

4. Lil Man made his 1st Holy Communion.



Is that not a handsome face?

5. That party I spoke about for his Birthday with a trailer full of video games turned out well, as did the cake...



I photoshopped the name out (sorry, must protect the innocent) so it looks a bit weird.

6. We have successfully made it through the 3rd grade Science Fair. I am SO glad I got an A!

7. Miss Thing and Lil Man are kicking ass in karate. Miss Thing became a Black Belt and Assistant Instructor and Lil Man became a Red Belt. He is getting excited to be closing in on Black Belt.

8. We have made it through another Spring Soccer Season. Miss Thing has continued to score goals on a regular basis and will be trying out for the premier league on Friday. And Lil Man, well, you remember my scorching details of watching my passive, sweet baby boy meander through the soccer field with his OLE defense?? Yes?? Well, this season - and I have NO idea why, he played. I MEAN, he FUCKING played, damn it. When he was on defense, he cleared the ball prompting a chorus of cheers from the sidelines FROM OTHER PARENTS!! The last game of the season he had TWO breakaways as a forward and I could hear the parents screaming and cheering him on and he took the shot LEFT FUCKING FOOT and hit the goal post. It didn't make it, but it was AMAZING!! I kept thinking WHO ARE THEY SCREAMING for and who the FUCK is this kid???? Wow, just wow, Lil Man.

All in all, a great school year. I can hardly believe I am the owner and coach of a Middle Schooler and a 4th Grader. They make me so proud.

I have finished another semester in Grad School. 17 classes done, two to go. TWO. I will finish in September 2009. I can hardly believe it. It has been a LONG 3 years. In the end, it will all be worth the effort and sacrifice to get that MFA with a 4.0 average. Yes, I am still the overachiever.

I have not been working out as much and need to get back on track. I need to workout for my health and my sanity. If I am not careful, I will be creeping back up on the scale in no time.

So, yeah. Life is good. I'll be back here more and hope to see you here!

Busy, Busy, Busy

WOW, is it April already? Yes, I suppose it is and I sincerely apologize for my lack of appearances over here. Damn Facebook!

Soooooooooooo, how are all of you? I hope well!

I am feverishly trying to do many things at the same time this week which include the following:

1. WORK, OMG, WORK, so much freaking work, which I am HAPPY about as I have my own business and NO WORK = NO FOOD.

2. Grad school. 2 classes. Out of 4 and then I am DONE. They are KILLER!

3. Prepare for Lil Man's 9th Birthday party. We are having a Mobile Trailer filled with full-size video games for non-stop and no quarters required. It should be fun as I found this in another town and no one around here has seen it yet. Downside? 20 little 9 year old boys at my house.

4. Need to make Lil Man's birthday cake. I am going to go with the video game theme and make a Pac Man screen cake, or at least try. Need to get stuff for that.

5. CLEAN.

6. Buy Lil Man a B-day present and some paper plates. (Making a list from here)

7. Begin to freak out that NEXT WEEK is Lil Man's Communion and I have nothing done. Well, not nothing, but I have A LOT to do!!

Going To See The Band I Love On Friday

Motley Freaking Crue!




I canNOT wait!

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Sorry to have dropped off the face of the earth lately, I honestly haven't had much to write about. Work has been steady, though not as busy as I would have liked. Though I am super psyched about a project I worked on and I can't wait to see it out in the world. I was able to design the actual razors and new packaging AND the PDQ they sit in. AWESOME. And I LOVE how they came out.

Teaching this semester, is like a GroundHog Day of last semester as it is the same group of kids. There are no stand outs, no one student with ambition, drive or passion. Teaching in a room full of graphic design students with no passion is like being at the All You Can Eat buffet with a bunch of anorexics. Not Much Fun. I can't help but think that the system failed these kids by telling them all how awesome they ALL are and that no one is better or worse than another. Hey, EVERYONE get a trophy! It breeds this mediocrity that they never strive to be the best, to kick ass, to design for the LOVE of designing. Sad.

Grad school continues on with the wrapping up of a Studio class where I have created the majority of the visual portion of my thesis. It has been great and I can hardly believe that I have exactly 4 classes left. Two classes that start in April and 2 in July. I'll be DONE by September 26th according to my student loans. These next few months are going to be killer stressful. Like yesterday when I thought I missed my Thesis Committee Conference Call and when into a full blown panic attack complete with uncontrolled shaking until I realized it was in a half hour. Yeah, good times.

Lil Man will be making his First Communion soon and I have already gotten the ball rolling on the invitations and party plans. Getting him into the suit and tie is an entirely different saga. Considering his daily wardrobe consists of KISS t-shirts and work-out pants, it ought to be interesting as I threaten his life in the changing rooms.

Well, I'm off.

I do have a favor to ask. I am collecting research for my thesis and have created a survey called "How Green Is Your Design" Currently I am trying to gather email addresses to send the survey to. If you are an artist/designer/creative director/printer and want to participate, please send your email address to me and I'll add you to the list. Don't worry, I will delete the comment here afterwards. THANKS!